Bats
Have you ever seen a close up of a bat eating a banana? Bats are actually very cute with their giant oversize eyes and fuzzy little bodies. Bats actually have tiny teeth and weak jaws, so they are unlikely to hurt you. Still, watch out for that 1% of the bat population (out of the bazillion of bats, that’s a small number) that might have rabies. In short, don’t bother bats and they won’t bother you.
Clowns
It's been a national pastime these past few years to hate on clowns. Pennywise from IT certainly gave us all the shivers and John Wayne Gacy’s “Pogo The Clown” is terrifying on many levels, but most clowns are just, well, kind of dumb. Clown greasepaint is/was just a way of dramatizing facial expressions. It’s also pretty easy to see a clown coming, so turn the other way if they make you uncomfortable.
Serial Killers
Books, movies and media on serial killers are always popular and it gives you the impression that you could run into one at any minute. One report says there may have been as many as 2000 in the U.S. in 2007. Now keep in mind that the U.S. population was 325.7 million in the same year. Serial killers don’t even rate in a population that large.
Sharks
First off, if you’re afraid of sharks, stay out of the ocean. There, you’re safe and we can all move on. Now even if you’re in the ocean, you’re odds are so slim they are almost immeasurable. On the average, 1, that’s one person is killed in the U.S. by a shark attack each year. That means the odds in 2007 were about 325.7 million to one.
The Night
Ah, the night. You never know what creepy stuff lurks in the dark do you? Well, there is one thing to always keep in mind, if you’re in familiar territory and it’s dark, you actually have the advantage. You know where your stuff is, leaving the tripping and bumping to whatever is trying to invade your space. At night there is less noise so you can hear what's around you better. Most of all, all of those terrifying things that can do you the most harm are asleep.
-Franky Ramone
Comments